Health Updates
Today’s visit was very difficult.
Dad couldn’t remember how to walk. He couldn’t stand himself up. He couldn’t drink from a cup without assistance.
He still recognized me and my family, but not much else. He sat with his eyes closed for most of my visit.
The doctor said he has taken another step down in the decline of the disease. I hope he isn’t suffering.
Hi everyone. I apologize for not posting in awhile; life.
I have been visiting dad every Saturday and have taken pictures which I will post here.
My visit today was very difficult on several fronts.
Being the days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, I find myself wanting my dad’s forgiveness, I am not sure what for, but I feel it nonetheless. Which made today’s visit tough, Dad was very confused as to why he was at the Loving Home. He wanted to know why he was not at the Eddy (which is the assisted living place near me). I explained to him that he is in the best place he can be and that he is getting the best care we could get. It didn’t seem to register with him. This seem to hit me hard today. I know I am doing the right thing for him. I know he is in the right place. I know he is being cared for. I know he is safe. It’s just… today was hard.
Tomorrow being the 2nd anniversary of Paul (my brother’s) yartzheit didn’t exactly help either. I spent most of my adult life being angry with him and we had only started to mend our relationship in the last year of his life. I have made peace with myself and him.
Dad is declining, the Alzheimer’s is getting worse. I know this is what is supposed to happen, but seeing him get worse is not easy. Going through my first set of holidays without him at the table has been very difficult. This is such a horrible disease.
Sorry to end on a low note. Pictures below as promised.
Saw the neurologist today with Dad and the prognosis is still the same. They are adjusting his medications to help him sleep better while still keeping him calm. I have been concerned about his weight, he has lost 20 pounds over the last couple of months. Found out he gained 2 pounds in the past week – yay Dad! He was alert and still able to recognize me. He was ambulatory as well, which is also a marker they track. Other than that, nothing new to report.
Had a good visit with Dad yesterday.
He still knows who I am but has no concept of time or place. He is paranoid about the staff being out to get him.
He has an appointment with the psychiatrist on Tuesday. I’ll let you know how it goes.
Just finished a nice visit with Dad. He was alert and talkative. We chatted about the girls and some mathematics. He was concerned one of the aides was trying to kill him, but we got past that. He has been eating better but still looks really thin. The nurse said he hasn’t been sleeping well so they made a change to his medication. Hopefully this will help.
Eliana, Tony and I went to see Dad today. He was very alert when we first got there. He looks like he has lost some more weight. Katie said he hasn’t be eating well and they have been supplementing with ensure. He was upset about the staff lying to him about when we would be there. He was anxious most of the time we were there, wanting to leave. We stayed for about an hour and then left to grab some lunch at a local restaurant, Marcella’s.
Met with the psychiatrist associated with the nursing home today. He did an assessment with the doctor and nurse from the nursing home. Richard is in the 3rd and final stage of decline. His immediate prognosis is 2 months to 2 years. While this was hard to hear, I know he wouldn’t want to live this way. I can only hope that what time he has left is quality time.
If you plan to visit him in person, I suggest you do it by the end of this year. Please let me know if you are coming from out of town as I would love to see you.
For everyone that is local, you will have to call the Nursing Home to make visitation arrangements at 518-357-8553.
If you want to send him something use the above address and make sure to include his name on the address.
Richard Goldstein 72 Fredericks Road Schenectady, NY 12302
Best time to call is between 11am and 3pm Eastern.
In February of 2022, Dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.
His cognitive abilities were declining at a pretty quick pace. Puzzles he liked to do every day became harder and harder for him. He wasn’t able to use reason and logic to solve simple KenKen’s any more.
We were instructed by the neurologist to have Dad take a driving assessment. He failed pretty spectacularly and they took away his license at the end of April of 2022.
I was taking him to appointments and brought him to my house to spend the days with us.
We started looking at Memory Care facilities in the area knowing that this was the next step. We found a place very close to where we live and they had everything we were looking for. We filled out all the paperwork and had our name on the list.
In the first week of June 2022, he had a defining moment. He woke up at 6:30am and was wandering around his neighborhood knocking on peoples’ doors asking if anyone knew who he was. That day, I moved him into my house. Since Shira is away at school, we were able to have him in her room.
We were doing ok for awhile, but it soon became apparent that I needed help. I called an Alzheimer’s home care group, Touching Hearts, and they were able to coverage around the clock. It was a godsend. I can’t say enough nice things about them.
June 15th 2022. Dad wakes up agitated and naked. He was threatening to rape and kill people, refused to get dressed, refused to eat or drink. He went to go lay down at 10am to rest.
June 16th 2022. It’s now 10am the next day and I can’t wake my dad up. I was pretty freaked out and called an ambulance. We spent the next two weeks at Albany Med. They ran every test they had – all came back clean. They couldn’t find anything that would explain this sudden change in his behavior nor the 24+ hours of sleeping. They were so understaffed, I was doing basic nursing tasks. My dad was not able to advocate for himself so I had to. I was with him almost 24 hours a day for the next month.
The social worker at the hospital was trying to find a rehab place for my father to be transferred to so he could get his strength back after being in bed for a month. I did a ton of research, made phone calls, pulled every string I had and came up with nothing. No beds available. After another week, we found a rehab place that had space for him. It was 5 minutes from my house and I felt like I could take a breath for the first time.
June 30th 2022. Dad is now settled in rehab, I have brought him his clothes and some of his favorite snacks. First night goes ok. First day goes ok.
July 3rd 2022. I get a call from the rehab place – Dad has bit one of the staff members and broke a computer.
July 4th 2022. I get a call from the rehab place – Dad has punched one of the staff members. and broke another computer.
July 5th 2022. I get a call from the rehab place – Dad has thrown his roommate’s wheelchair across the room, and had almost broken a staff member’s nose. They called the police and an ambulance and had my father taken to Samaritan hospital. They have a high risk ER section.
Heading to Samaritan to see my dad. 3 hours into our stay at Samaritan, their social worker comes in and talks to me about my dad’s history and current situation. She tells me she knows of a place that is perfect for my dad and she wants to be sure there is an available bed and goes to make a phone call. She comes back and says, they have a bed and will be here in two hours to take Dad there.
At first I was in shock, then I cried. I told her she was the first person to help me in almost a month. I couldn’t stop crying as I was filling out the paper work. The doctor who oversees the nursing home, the nurse who lives there full time and two of their aides came and took my dad.
I visited Dad today for the first time since I got back from Chicago.
He was alert and able to move around. He asked about me and my family, which was nice. He thought he had been with the Taliban for the last 6 months and was telling me what they were doing to him, not so good.
Snapped a pic while I was there.
Richard Goldstein 